My faith in Marvel Comics has been plummeting for years. Just the same, the publisher plays host to one of my favorite superheroes in existence: Spider-Man. Amazing always had me hooked, and both Spectacular and Web of were also mighty fine books. But I’ve been away from the character for a long time, and returning, I noticed that there are a number of new and different books out there, so I ended up with a few issues of Ultimate Spider-Man.

The debut issue, was an enormous letdown. We’re talking, stomach sinking, contemplating never returning to my best bud Peter Parker’s world. Why was the book so bad? Because it was the exact same story we’ve seen told in print on a slew of different occasions, and it’s a story we’ve now seen multiple times on screen.

Yep, it was the damned Spider-Man origin story yet again. I don’t know how the gang at Marvel don’t realize that this introductory arc has been done so many damn times unborn fetuses know it by heart.

Why show us this story for the 20^th time? There are probably millions out there who aren’t even Spider-Man fans that can tell you the story of dorky Parker who gets bit by a radioactive spider and becomes a superhero.

Every. Human. Knows. This. Story.

So, thanks for wasting a few of my bucks there, Marvel. That seems to be one of the extremely few things you do well these days.

Before I walk away from this frustrated rant I do want to say this: the book looks very nice.

Rating: 1.5/5